my reply.

another reason for me to be irritated at my lack of internet access.

that goddess over there at after ophelia friggin dedicated this awesomely introspective rant to one of my earlier posts (scroll down to the too early to write poetry post).

and i fucking missed it.

so #1: my bad.
#2: my reply.

one of my best one liners ever. i will put this in a book one day, people... so don't even TRY to steal this.

why on earth would you work so hard to build something that will never truly stand?

...

that's easy. i'm in it for the falling.

it is so rare to find someone who really rox your sox that i really don't give a flinging poo if it is going to work out. just the chance to share a few (even if they are fleeting) moments of tummy tingle is worth all the heartbreak in the world to me.
those people that say they are ruined by break ups (ahem ahem) are forgetting that in order to appreciate the bad, you hafta appreciate the good. and vice versa. if it weren't for the sting of that heartbreak you wouldn't realize how glorious the love feels.

but lets /end preaching sappiness here. i think rico hit the nail on the head. it would be very easy for me to just fit my future into a box like my past. it would be safe. a sinch for me to handle. and i like being in control.

it's hard to get excited about tingles when you have experienced a lot of loneliness. wait. that doesn't sound right. what i mean is. when i feel tingles... i don't care if they are returned because the tingles in themselves are fucking bomb and worth it.
but... as time has gone on... when the pattern turns out that the person you are tingling for doesn't want to/know how to return them... it gets kinda cloudy.

ugh. my heart hurts.

and now i'm late for dinner.

i have faith. i'll get knocked on my ass eventually. and when i do... he can break my heart to pieces... i'll adore him for it.