you know how it works... you enter a new relationship and suddenly his friends are now your friends. or you'd better pray that they like you and accept you or you might as well start the crying and breakuping without wasting your time.
after this particular relationship ended, clearly, my place in the group was just as a cameo recurring role that had it's run and now it was onto bigger (literally) and better (yeah right) things.
anyway... i had managed to remain a sort of "high point" in the relationship career of my ex. at least. until yesterday.
while i have no regrets about my behavior OR my outfit... i do have a sense of foreboding nastiness with this whole thing. but then again i am paranoid and hyperly aware and i think way too much (not my choice in words, but i've heard it enough that i'm starting to believe it) so this really could be nothing.
people are just not like me.
and the disappointment of this realization is beyond expression.
it seems like everyone is well aware and accepting of faults and flaws and mistakes... but only certain kinds.
my kinds are just too much i suppose. HEY! maybe THAT could be my claim to fame. my powerful, thought-provoking, heart-wrentching flaws.
tragic hero looks good for a job title right about now. but that takes hubris. who am i kidding... this will work out nicely.
i can start tomorrow.
you said you'd always be there for me
well then
where the hell have you been
where'd you go
why did you leave me all alone
did you not mean what you said
does anyone ever really mean it
do words mean
anything
to anyone other than me
what about
i love you
or how about
i love you too?
do words mean
anything
to anyone other than me
it seems like the only ones that do
are the ones you
don't say
don't say it
don't say that one exception
i honestly don't know why
the only word that you ever said to me
that meant something
was when you said
good bye
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