his quiet makes me uneasy.

that saying "no news is good news"... yeah. i don't buy it. i never have.

i always pry... ask questions i shouldn't... say things that beg to be further explained... all of this in hopes of some unveiling of secret, juicy information that i crave. i'm always looking for a hidden motive or complex. and while some of you would say that if i were a verb, i would be kiss... i must admit... i would be analyze. it's what i do.

he looks content. his actions express his affinity for me. i feel chemistry between us.

but i watch him almost constantly... except when deliberately avoiding his eyes. his dopey grin. his carelessly vibrant hair. his hands. that neck.

and when we do lock eyes... his leave me intrigued. i want to jump inside them and swim around. they look like pools of autumn.

i adore the way he looks while he kisses me.

but i am searching his face. for some sort of sign. i told him today... i told him that i couldn't read his face. and i can't. and it makes me nervous. because he is short a few bars for the title of "most deliberately communicative when it comes to his feelings"... for someone who relies heavily on the use of the english language to express herself... it leaves me in a constant wonder of how he is feeling.

i worry that he isn't into me and the moment as much as i am? or that maybe there isn't anything there to read?

i am not one of those girls who wants to hear that they are beautiful every 5 minutes... but i do want to hear about his impression of me and the things that he enjoys and thrives off of from me. i want to hear him acknowledge what is happening between us.

at least... i hope there is something happening bewteen us. and i don't want to sit and beg like a puppy. but i am always thirsty for it. always waiting. always aware of the lack of words being spoken when we connect. and as much as i like those moments where words are not necessary... i need to hear his mouth translate his heart beats.

and i guess the only way is to translate mine first. ::thump thump:: ::thump thump::