Why So Serious, Liz?

So I am kind of obsessed with the Joker from Dark Knight (like half the population), and decided that I would dress up like him as the nurse in the hospital scene for Halloween (again, like half the population).

But I was nervous about being able to do the face paint properly (seriously, google image it... there are a lot of shitty examples out there), so a friend of mine and I broke out the make up and some beer and went to work last night for practice.


What we learned is that I need to not go so far down below the eyes with the black, make sure my scars are glued on really well, and go a little easier on the red. With my hair frizzed out a little more, it's the perfect length (and the color sort of matches the red wig he wore), AND I found a dress that looks like a nurse's uniform with red accents. I even printed up a Harvey Dent sticker...

Yeah. I'm fucking excited.

Applying to MSPP

The Massachusetts School of Professional Psychology offers a Master of Arts program in Counseling Psychology.

Obviously, I am applying.

While the GRE’s are optional (hence why this is the first school I am actually making an effort for), I do have quite the list of things I need to include in my application:

• $50.00 Application Fee (non-refundable)

Oh, the joy.

• Completed application form

Which, of course, I have to fill out online. We will wait on that one.

• Three (3) letters of recommendation

I just hope it won’t count against me that two of them will be from music teachers at the same school.

• Curriculum Vitae

This is fancy talk for “kick-ass resume.”

• Autobiographical Statement

A 3 – 5 page AUTOBIOGRAPHY?!?! Please. Kill me.

• Statement of Purpose & Goals

Another 3 – 5 pages of self-righteous drivel. While I enjoy writing these sorts of things… I DISDAIN being judged by them.

• Official transcript(s)

Easy. Got one already… somewhere in here… I think…

• Change of Career Statement

Unfortunately, I think this might just be applicable to me. We shall see if “Performance Design” can really count as a “career.”

This is going to be a LOT of work. Pray for me.

See more progress on: go to grad school in boston

State Champions, What?

Last Saturday, we fucking did it.

Our third competition of the year, and we take State Championships in our division with a band score of 87.5 and a guard score of 17.2!! This is our second “Best Colorguard” of the season, and I honestly have to say that I am surprised at it.

As you can see from the video, the girls did not have a clean run. We got the score we did (I’m guessing), based heavily on my design and writing, rather than their execution of it. The judge did see us 2 weeks ago, marking how much we have improved, but I’m just not satisfied with the performance yet.

Out of the 19 bands competing, we got the second highest guard score. Period. Had my kids been tighter… we could have taken THE ENTIRE SHOW.

It’s been four days, and still… typing this is surreal.

But the bottom line is this: We need to clean. We need to work. We are 8 TENTHS of a point from achieving our goal, and more importantly, from establishing ourselves as a fucking FORCE in the circuit.

I think it’s time that I admit something to myself. I am no longer that wanna-be, self-taught little punk trying to pull this program out of her butt. I am a damn good designer… and a damn good instructor. My kids love their show, they work their asses off, and I learn something new from them every day.

If you asked me where I wanted to be 10 years ago when I started instructing… I would have said “running a program with a solid group of kids that earns the respect of their band, school and competitive circuit.” And holy crap… I actually pulled it off.

See more progress on: Lead my colorguard to a score of 18.0

processing...

i fear that if i speak it out loud,
everything will be cheapened
and end up N O T being
as good as it would have been
had they just known without my asking.

perpetual.
dissatisfaction.
... of my own design?

or is it
true to form
that the only satisfaction i find
is that time spent alone
exploring the curves
of my own intangible naked body?

that body of tingles
and big bang theory
that only reveals itself to me
when i s l o w d o w n long enough
to see everyone else spinning
their wheels
in a race that i never entered

they all sleep now
and i am almost relieved.
because in the middle of this night i don't have to pretend
that i am content
with them getting theirs
and me
just getting along...

The Friday Five: Can't Live Without

This week's questions are brought to you courtesy of an anonymous reader, the letter F, and the number 5...

1. What is the one most important thing by your side right now?

My Gock Block and Drum Stick.

2. Why is it so important?

I use my gock block to keep tempo for my kids whenever we have rehearsal in an area where other sounds may keep them from hearing my voice clearly. Don't get me wrong -- my voice carries, but this let's me do my job effectively without going hoarse.

3. Can you live without it?

Yes... but it sucks.

4. What is the one thing you can't live without?

Words.

5. Who is the one person you can't live without?

I want to say my Daddi... but I know that some day I am going to have to live without him. And well, that is the scariest thing in the world to me... so I'd rather not think about it anymore.

This sort of thing only happens on bad sitcoms.

The other day, oom oom and I were at Safeway. There was only one item on our shopping list: tampons.

Quite simply, I had left the house without backup. And after a quad venti cup of skim, no whip white mocha heaven... I needed to pee.

But before we get any deeper into this, let me say that Safeway has a horrible aisle numbering/labeling system. So after a lap around the entire building, I settled in to examine and determine my feminine reciprocal product of choice.

Some women are very particular about the brand/size/type of applicator they use... and while I would like to have certain standards for anything I voluntarily shove into my tunnel of love... my bottom line is my budget.

After much deliberation, I decided to go with 2 packages of 20 Regular, Unscented Pearls, not for the excellent marketing campaign, but for the little sign below them saying "2 for $4."

We mosey on up to check out, I hand the cashier my club card, she scans my packages with great care, and proceeds to tell me that my total is $12 and some change.

Sigh. "I thought those were on sale, 2 for $4." I offer to run back and check the sign, but apparently I am not trustworthy. The cashier begins by paging a female coworker to come up to our station for a price check. No such female coworker appears. She walks over to a neighboring female cashier to ask her for help, but she offers no real advice.

But then! Pimple-faced adolescent male stock boy comes to the rescue! He disappears down the aisle, returning to say that only the Safeway brand tampons are on sale. I apologize for wasting her time, as she seemed very flustered and worried that her other customers would be mad for having to wait these 5 extra minutes, and attempt to take the tampons back to exchange them for the cheaper option. But no, no, no... let's make this a little more awkward. Have the pimple boy accompany me back, carrying the scorned tampons for me.

After I apologized to him for the most cliche of situations, he turned a little red and scampered away. It was only then that oom oom and I began the debriefing.

The sign was not where it was when we first walked down the aisle. Clearly, it had been misplaced, and that is why the sale price did not come up. I get it. No big deal. But the Safeway brand tampons that WERE on sale... the only ones left were the scented ones. And I'm sorry, but I don't need potpourri ANYWHERE near my hoo haw. That's just doing nature a disservice.

In the end, I went with a Kotex Regular UNSCENTED 36 pack... but mine aren't purple like the website leads you to believe. This item was on sale for $6... and I am very pleased with the performance thus far.

Unfortunately, when I went back up to the check out, my beloved cashier had the longest line in the place, so I did not get to share a knowing glance or witty quip with her.

Alas... my Price Check Episode was left anticlimactic and unfulfilled (much like this blog entry?).

Steps in the Left Direction:

It is very last minute, but this Sunday, I am participating in DC's Walk For Hope, a 5k walk/run to help find a cure for breast cancer. If you are able and willing, visit My Walk for Hope Donation Page and be my sponsor!

I have also started a life goal list on 43 things. There isn't much there yet, but I will let you know when I update it.

Thirdly, I signed up for Postcrossing again. I have already sent out my first postcard:



I've also been in contact with some long-lost inspiration... and I am SO thankful that they are still around :)

Second Marching Band Competition

After our first marching performance, even with the horrible transition from part 2 and the beginning of part 3, we are only 2 points away from our goal, with a score of 16.0.

The critique delivered no surprises as to what we need to fix, it’s all just a matter of time. With only 3 real rehearsals until our next competition, we are quite literally racing the clock.

This week I hope to add the weapon choreography, change the drill and get things solidified before our home game on friday.

See more progress on: Lead my colorguard to a score of 18.0

Spare Change(s).

free time outlines minutes i should have spent typing here, jogging there, and laughing everywhere. or preparing healthy meals, saving money, taking pictures, reading books not yet read and returning emails not yet answered. minutes i could have made mine. hours that could have been spent creating, dancing, singing, sweating, bleeding -- instead of wasting. days, weeks and months i could have been making love to myself... instead of men who i wish loved me.

i could already have my grad degree. or hundreds of pages published (or at least photocopied). or dozens of songs written, sung, performed and recorded. or blue prints and business proposals for the B&W.

but i don't. i just have dreams. hopes. and maybe a twinge of regret.

idiom:

in vain
a. without effect or avail; to no purpose.
b. in an improper or irreverent manner.